It was a bright sunny day
when he came to me we had a lot to say and something interesting to see we walked and created a river of memories that we could look up to and in a day it made me full of worries as the time swiftly flew Its quite easy to break a bond especially at the start where one side only responds and the other breaks apart Its wishful to think of it as a dream that should have not been true so i close my eyes to that beam of light and open them to see a million skies that were blue
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Almost all the time that I think about my life, I regret, I smile, I chuckle but most importantly I think of the things that I shouldn’t have done . Every minute of every hour and every hour of each day I am on a quest for answers to questions that don’t exist. Questions that have a relevance to our identity and our spot in this grandiose world.
Human beings are complex creatures, but their complexity is just as unique as their simplicity. One man cries on a death, the other laughs harder inside. One man’s trash is another man’s treasure. Death and life are two sides of the coin but what lies in the middle is what makes the most difference. This middle ground is where we’re different. This middle ground is what sets our impression of who we are. I want to relive today, but to what extent is that possible. I want to go back to yesterday, is that realistic ?. What makes my today different from yesterday? I want to know the next move of this middle ground game. The move that makes me win it. Where is the win? what if there is a perfect move what happens after it? What if there isn’t ? Worse still, what if moving wasn’t an option ? Is being lost a valid feeling? What happens when you’ve got nowhere to go, or you don’t know if there is such a thing as somewhere. See we fail to universally accept that direction is only what defines the path we follow. Follow and justify, do and reason, cause and consequence . These are just some of the common ways in which mankind builds blocks of the game. Done something without reason, supported a cause without a consequence, followed a path without justification, achieved a goal without a strategy. To belong, to reside and to be part of something is a key challenge for many from the rich to the poor, the educated to the illiterate. How far does this belonging reach ? How does it feel to not belong ? Does it have limits or do we set our own limits for it? Well, if that’s true there sure must lie a point at which we don’t want this affinity, this sense of belonging or as some may call it inclusion. At that point can it be sure that we are set free ? Even if we are, what is it that we’re free from ? Is this free not as liberating as one wants it to be ? The freedom that makes us do things that were unthinkable, a freedom that brings us closer to ourselves yet sets us apart from others. A freedom that is beyond the bare definition of freedom. a freedom with infinite opportunities and equally infinite unfortunate events. Limits are made to be broken just like rules. That’s the whole reason they exist. It’s still surprising that even our freedom isn’t the same for us despite our constantly appearing universal need for inclusion. Someone’s act of emancipation is another’s act of restraint. A neutral act that doesn’t exist, either free or trapped, is there an option in between the two. In this race to the survival of the fittest, we often forget about the inbetweener. The one that runs the race is not to win or lose, not to defeat . They are just part of the game with an almost unknown purpose. If you’re able to find this purpose, I’ll be impressed not because you’re enlightening people that don’t know about it but because you’re certain that you’ve found it. Until then, keep chasing it… identify it, define it, reason it and then contradict it until it, it is nothing … As I watched my phone vibrate at “It’s a match” on Tinder, a coy smile and an excitement of nerves were running throughout my body. After a few days of texting over on Tinder, we decided to go on a virtual date via Zoom, an online video conferencing platform. Since, I’m someone that normally goes on a real date, this zoom date sounded rather farfetched to my conventional personality. I tried to recollect my last meeting with someone virtually and the closest I could get to was a video call with my friend who lives back in New Zealand, while I was here in Dubai. Despite the network challenges initially, It seemed a controlled conversation. Therefore this time, I decided to do something different, put on a cute dress, some light make up and went on this zoom date. It went just fine, except the anxiety of doing everything online which kicked in a few minutes into our zoom call. What happened next is just a series of the stuff I’ve realized about dating in times of the COVID-19 pandemic. Before the novel Corona Virus arrived, I was a happy go lucky, confident and adventurous woman, that looked forward to meeting a new person in the hope to create some great memories. However, in times of crisis, I noticed so many underlying issues with the concept of dating. A video call with someone can help you understand them to a certain extent, however the lack of physical contact has meant much less. I certainly miss those subtle gentle touch games we played where our shoulders almost rubbed across by mistake, those hand gestures and casual hugs. In addition to our discussions on who’d pay the bill, or we’d split. our conversations had a drop of humor. What I didn’t realize was that all of this was a new way of normal. The challenges I and many others face now, though, particularly millennials and Gen Zers, have often been fodder for humor. Instagram users are creating accounts dedicated to suggesting timely pickup lines like, “If the virus doesn’t take you out, can I?” On Twitter, many have compared the situation with the Netflix reality series Love Is Blind, in which contestants talk to each other in isolated pods, unable to see or touch their dates. But for singles who are yet to find partners , the uncertainty prevails Fewer couples decide to start families, isolation means the loss of that portion of life most young adults count on to forge grown-up friendships and romantic relationships. Although we had a great laugh with the casual Corona based flirting that surrounds, the dating landscape in quarantine undoubtedly presents an unprecedented situation for most singles today. Moreover, I find myself wondering, if the person I was meeting through webcam at the comfort of my home is going to be the same in real life. Even though, texting has been around ever since I started going on dates, its evolution in these times has been quite significant. The casual small talk is actually turning into what I may call quality conversation between two unknowns. With a flood of insightful conversations over chat or video conferencing, dating is transforming itself to match with the needs of this day. It’s also definitely helped my wallet. I usually split for the first date but in fact I’m saving hundreds by not going out, a factor no doubt high in the minds of many online daters as unemployment soars. Although, the constant fear of ghosting, people standing up on virtual dates, cheating survives, it’s certainly difficult to gauge a truer or rather more candid version of the dating situation. It may depend entirely on the person you’re with and one would hope that people would be slightly more considerate in times of a pandemic isolated at their homes. Though the risk prevails, taking that chance is probably the best thing you can do for yourself. If you look at it from an evolutionary perspective, for millions of years we had tactile contact like hugs and cuddles. Every relationship has been built and held together by complicated nonverbal language, beginning with parent and child. It’s part of our social fabric. I worry about what happens when as a society we lose those modes of communication for a time. I wonder what it would be like to carry a sanitizer instead of the casual gifts that we take on special occasions. What the future would look like is blurry at the moment or even not so promising for the majority of us. Unless you are the lucky committed, married or live in couple that gets to spend time together instead of staying socially distant in quarantine. Perhaps, it’s time we switched gears and changed our priorities, rethought our relationships, and redefined the connotations of dating online. So, do yourself a favor, create a tinder account, meet that new person and go on that new journey again. It’s obviously not going to be as smooth as it was in the past, but it does leave no stone unturned. Grab your sanitizer, your smartphone and your most quirky Corona pickup line and make that move today. Previously on Netflix & chill, it’s time to adopt the isolation pill. |
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